Tuesday, March 25, 2008
Humboldt Happenings
Friday, March 21, 2008
Babe the Blue Ox
We girls are on our way to the Shakespeare Festival in Ashland, Or. Spring break is here, so we decided to make another road trip. Last year we went to Chinatown in San Francisco. This year on TJ's recommendation we went to Oregon. On the way we stopped by Trees of Mystery in Klamath to see the now famous headless Blue Ox. Paul Bunyan and his ox, Babe, have been tourist attractions for years yet it wasn't until last year that Babe became a national celebrity. It seems that one stormy night, Babe lost his head. When workers arrived that morning, Babe's massive plaster head was lying in shatters on the ground. For some strange reason I thought this most amusing. I laughed and laughed when I saw this in real time! If you look really close you can see that some prankster has even put a little tiny ox head on the tarp covering the hole! Funny, funny.
Wednesday, March 19, 2008
Image of Royalty - Pt. 2
The responsibility of owning your own horse is not all fun and pleasure as most people would assume it to be. A big part of the joy of having a horse is taking care of the animal with grooming, brushing, cleaning and buying tack, saddles, riding equipment and the like. One of the lesser spoken of expenses of horse ownership would be the vet bills. As I mentioned previously, my daughter's horse had an accident the other day when they went riding up in Salmon Creek. Image got tangled up in some barbed wire while the girls were working cattle up at the Ranch
Reebs showed me the photos of the leg today after two earlier trips to the vet.
This is what the injury looks like. I think Gus' (grandpa undersheriff) face pretty much says enough for all of us.
This is a nasty cut. Apparently he was wound up in the wire long enough to shred the skin this much. Nothing that a week or so of antibiotics can't take care of.
Couple of these big babies and Image should be feeling better in no time.
Monday, March 17, 2008
Image of Royalty
So, years later Image has now become a huge part of my daughter's life by becoming the love of her life. She adores him and he, her. This adoring relationship hasn't come with out a cost; hours of personal sacrifice and training, yards and yards of manure, and of course, expenses. The cost of owning a horse motivated her to get a job. Another good reason to let her have the horse. She cleaned houses, offices, babysat; whatever she could do to provide herself with the funds to keep her Prince living with us in the back yard. Then came her first vet bill. Image tends to be a little accident prone. Once he got stuck in an old greenhouse and tried to jump through an old window. That vet bill cost her about $1000. Today he had another run in with a barbed wire fence and tore up his back leg...$650. Ouch. Through it all, though, my daughter has diligently pressed through these challenges without losing hope of success. She has made a commitment to her boy and she fully intends to keep it no matter how difficult it may be at times. I know that she would say that the hours and hours of pleasure and love Image has given back to her over the years would far out weigh the slightest inconvenience his mishaps have caused her. And the boyfriend thing? Well, I must say that the statistics weren't that far off. She was about 17 when she fell for her first cowboy! Luckily for Mom and Dad, it was very short lived and didn't last too long! The reasonings that she used to persuade her parents all those years ago have all been realized as our daughter has lived up to her commitment and has proven to me once again that through this experience she has grown into a woman of great strength and moral character. BooBoo, I am so proud of you and humbled to be your mother. You amaze me!
Thursday, March 13, 2008
Teens .... Home Alone
First they raid the Kitchen and cook up whatever remnants of food they can find. .
Then while their food is cooking or whatever, they run around like crazies
Glad that it's only Mountain Dew that they are drinking!
Then they break out the steel pans.... and dance!
and of course, they eat.
Reminds me of the book, the Cat in the Hat.
Tuesday, March 11, 2008
Canvas of Constancy
Sunday, March 09, 2008
Humboldt House of Peace
Yesterday was the opening day of the House of Peace in Redway at the corner of Briceland Rd.and Par Ave. (formerly Noah's Ark Preschool). The House of Peace is a place where anyone can come, hangout and seek. It is a place of spiritual discovery. It is a place where seekers can come and ask questions, search scriptures, and understand more about themselves, about their beliefs and about their place in creation. The compassionate couple who traveled all the way from Ohio to begin work on this endeavor are eager to share their gift of love to those walking through their doors. The place is newly decorated inside with a feel of your own home making it warm and inviting.Working alongside other outreach groups in the community, the House of Peace will offer spiritual insight to anyone who is longing for answers to some of the more difficult questions of life. Mike and Julie are willing to invest their time into those who would seriously like to anchor themselves in truth. Anyone who would like to check it out is welcome to stop by and visit. Hours vary, so make sure you check ahead before you make the trip.


Friday, March 07, 2008
Last WW1 veteran
www.msnbc.msn.com/id/21134540/vp/23505804#23505804
Mr. Buckles had come to Washington from his 330-acre cattle farm near Charles Town, W.Va., to meet President Bush in the Oval Office--which hadn't even been built when he was born--for the unveiling of his portrait as part of an exhibit at the Pentagon. We sat down with him for an exclusive interview in the Map Room of the White House, where President Franklin Roosevelt plotted the progress of World War II.
When 108-year-old Harry Landis died in Sun City, Fla., on Feb. 4, Buckles became the only living U.S. veteran of the "war to end all wars"--the last man standing in a line of nearly 5-million Americans who served in uniform during that war.
He attributes his longevity to "the desire to live … I have something to survive for. I have a daughter, who, of course, is dear to me," he said, gesturing to Susannah Buckles Flanagan, 52, who sat nearby.
He does 50 sit-ups everyday and drove a tractor on his farm until five years ago--the same time he stopped driving himself to appointments.
"What made you stop?" I asked.
"My daughter," he said, with a laugh. "I would have been driving a lot longer than I did."
By John Yang, NBC News correspondent
Wednesday, March 05, 2008
Heart Humboldt
March 8-9, 2008
HEART HUMBOLDT is a volunteer weekend with a goal to bring churches across Humboldt County together to serve their communities. This is intentionally placed two weeks before Easter, the ideal time to send a message to the community that the Church is active and celebrates compassion. Some churches will actually count it as their weekly Sunday worship time, giving a whole new meaning to church service!
HEART HUMBOLDT was inspired by a pilot project in 2007 called Serve Day. This year, sponsored by NorCANs committee for Faith & Action, it is poised to expand to a multiple church project.This Sunday at 11:00 a.m. we have a group going up to Eureka to decorate at Pacific Rehabilitation Facility. We will also be participating in organizing a supply room and office storage area as well as playing Bingo with some of the residents! If you are interested in participating in any of the activities offered I suggest you go to the link I have posted above and join a group! Blessings
Saturday, March 01, 2008
Cattleman's Dinner

Shindig in Ferndale! Tonight we all went on down to the Cattleman's Dinner. Y'all know what that means. Lots of beef, beer and line dancin'. This is a photo of me and my dad (Tom).

The Chapman's had a great time as well.

Joy in the Journey & the Humboldt Crud

Some days are just like that. By the end of the day the weariness settles in, the emotional ups and downs weigh heavy on our hearts and just the general fatigue of living in the 21st century takes its toll on our bodies . Having the Humboldt crud in the bronchial chest area doesn't help either. I have had the crud now for over a week. Coughing, breathing issues and the like have tried desperately to take over my good health as my immune system valiantly tries to fight it off. So far, it feels more like the long drawn out war in Iraq as opposed to the quick surge in Afghanistan; some days it feels like I'm winning the next it seems like the insurgents are taking over. It's taking some time. Winter in Humboldt can be long and damp which can make a cold linger for weeks.
So, such as it is, I realize my last post perhaps may have been depressing. But who is never a little down? Sometimes I think we put too much emphasis on always having to be "up". Like upbeat, bubbly, positive or congenial. Even Jesus had days that because of the depravity of man caused him to feel down. Not that He lost hope, but saddened and emotional about the way things were.
My heart is saddened when I see the aged of our society in what is perhaps their last days. Growing old is not something for the faint of heart. I realize now how courageous these older folks really are. Just as I am fighting off the effects of my cold so too are they fighting to fend off the aging process. And they have good days and bad days. Maybe growing old is just like having one long cold.
Aside - going to the beach, taking long walks, playing with my kids are all great ways to celebrate the health that God has given me. Some days are full, bright and sunny with lots of activities while other days are slow, emotional and tedious. Through it all, God sustains. He hears the longings we have in our hearts for more good days to spend with our friends and loved ones. And while these days click by like fingers punching out an email on a keyboard, each and every one of them is to be treasured.
Philippians 4:12, 13
I know what it is to be in need, and I know what it is to have plenty.
I have learned to be content in whatever the circumstances. I have learned the secret of being content in any and every situation whether well fed or hungry, living in plenty or in want, (healthy or sick) and that is ....
I can do all things through Christ who strengthens me.
Tuesday, February 26, 2008
Humboldt wild grapes

While working with my ladies today, the Lord gave me the greatest illustration of aging. If we look at a bunch of grapes we will see that there are many grapes in one grouping, but all in various stages of ripeness. The younger grapes are green and hard and have not come into their full maturity yet. This would represent young people in their first 20 yrs. Then you have the ripening grapes that in themselves have various levels of ripeness. Some are partially green while turning their more ripe color of purple at the same time. This would be those people who are in their 30's. Then there are others at their peak of ripeness. Their color is just the right shade of purple, their texture is just the right amount of firmness, and their flavor is the absolute sweetest it could possibly be. These might represent people in their early 40's. But, wait...these grapes are only so sweet for a couple of days, then their flavor begins to wane somewhat. Just like in our late 40's...we ask ourselves, "where did these wrinkles come from? Or, I don't remember my skin being so dry or my hair being so thin". We would call this midlife. As color in the grapes begins to deepen, the flavor begins to deepen as well and the grapes are only useful for eating fresh for a couple more days. Which brings us to the downward slide of midlife, our 50's. We are still in our prime but not for very long. Then eventually, the grapes will transform from grapes to raisins. We can still eat them because they are now "dried fruit" which is still something that we can use. So now we are looking at our 60's. Wrinkled, but with enough life to contribute. As we march on into our 70's we are like the raisins that are still edible, but now just not quite as satisfying as before. Like the ones that we leave in the container too long in the cupboard. And lastly, there are always a few fruits on the vine that have completely ripened already and they are no longer able to be used for any kind of consumption. They are shriveled and dry and discarded with the stems. I guess this would be us in our 80's and 90's. Most of us don't make it any further than this.
Morbid, I know. Even depressing. We don't like to ponder our frailty, our temporary state of being. I am sorry to be so contemplative, but I have been so confronted with it lately that I am completely overwhelmed with it. One of my little ladies took a turn for the worse today. Norma has had that upper respiratory virus that is going around and it is getting the best of her. Pray for her. And bear good fruit while you can.....
Monday, February 25, 2008
Training days

Today was my first day with Norma and Lucille. These two gals are roommates at the resident home where I am doing my nurse assistant training. They have the distinct honor of being the very first persons to receive my somewhat non-existent skills of "A.M. Care. ” This morning care would include dressing, washing, brushing and preparing these fine ladies for their soon to arrive breakfast. Upon arrival, I found that Lucille had already made a B-line for the dining hall. She was nowhere to be found. Norma on the other hand was snoozing soundly in her warm bed, mouth agape with a slight turning up of the corners. She was enjoying some sweet sleep. I hated to wake her, but I had a mission. Three of us were assigned to take care of these girls, which at first I thought a little ridiculous, but then again, I hadn't met Lucille yet. More on that later. Norma awakened reluctantly only to have these three overeager student trainees looking at her like she were a princess waiting to be attended to. She gently smiled at the anticipation of being showered with attention or perhaps because she thought this would be the perfect opportunity to have a little fun with us. We informed her we were going to give her a tub bath, bubbles and all, to which she amiably acquiesced. Things went pretty well in the bathing room until we turned on the air jets in the tub and the bubbles really began to grow! Apparently we had used a little bit too much soap! Pretty soon Norma had wispy white bubbles creeping up to her chin. We decided,(as a group, of course) to pull the plug and rinse her off with the hand held shower. This proved to be a very good decision and Norma was hoisted from the tub and promptly dressed. Mission accomplished. Into the wheelchair and off to breakfast we went. (another group decision.).
Norma sat at the table with her usual friends. You know these folks will let you know when things are not quite on spot. Wrong table? Oh.... she likes to go over there? Got it. They don't miss a beat. So with breakfast served, we went off to find a new mission. Where was Lucille?
After several trips down the hall, through the dining area then back to the room, we found her. She was sitting quietly in her chair keeping an eye on the nurse's station. I bent down to say hello to her when someone tapped me on the shoulder and warned me. “She hits and scratches, so watch out.” Thanks for the tip, I thought. I carefully bent down to greet her and she reached out to take my hand. She was a little bit of a gal. Probably only 90 lbs or so. She pensively looked up at me as I said hello and then quietly wept. Just for a second. Then she let me know who was in charge here, and that she meant business. She was a feisty little thing! Now I knew why they put us all together with these sweet ladies. Size is not match even when someone is 40 yrs older than you are, let me tell you. Actually, she wasn't difficult. After all, how many other N. A. had she had to put up with lately? Were they all as clumsy as me? If so, I could totally see her annoyance. I told her we were going to take her back to her room and freshen her up a bit so she could take a rest on her bed. Once we got her on her bed, she made it very clear to us that she didn't like being fussed with. We did our best to make her as comfortable as we could. I think I was the only one who survived the entire ordeal with out a poke or a jab or a nip, but we again accomplished our mission.
About an hour later, I looked in on our gals and found them comfortably sleeping away the late morning. Tomorrow I will have the same two ladies, so as they say, we will see what the morrow brings. Oh, you're wondering about the photo of the horse? I just thought it was a pretty picture of Shyanne.
Saturday, February 16, 2008
Above Humboldt
Today I climbed a mountain. A mountain called Monument. When the morning sun is beaming through my eastern facing windows and the village life gets too close, I head for the hills. This is where my I can give my being a much needed rest. I stood there on that mountain that gazes down upon my town amazed at the beauty and wonder that laid before me. The carefully organized little town of Scotia, the rolling hills of Hydesville, the friendly town of Fortuna set next to the path of the Eel River which makes its way leisurely down to the Pacific Ocean all were visible. Even the Humboldt Bay was clearly in view in the far distance. WOW! I had never before beheld such a view of this area! The day was what I like to call a "turquoise" day, when the sky and the ocean are that incredible shade of blue that just draws you into it. The kind of day that demands that you get out and experience its fullness. Days like this are little pieces of heaven that break off and land here just for us to enjoy. God likes to give us a glimpse of His world. That's what I told my kids, anyway! The road that lay before me beckoned me to its summit and there I stood, gazing down upon the day. I love Humboldt county. So many areas to explore, so many places to get away from town and just get quiet.
Sunday, February 10, 2008
Ferndale
I have been trying to get out and about more when the weather is nice. This time of year it can be hit or miss. Today was beautiful. While planning my escape, I remembered this old country road in Ferndale that meanders along a quiet creek winding its way down to the Eel River. I stumbled upon this trek while attending a Senior Hiking club outing. (Yes, I do now qualify to participate in senior things. They keep lowering the age for qualifying, so now at 50, I can go along with them!) A few weeks ago we went on this 5 mile walk as a group, but today it was mine alone. I took my dog along and off we went. I walked, I prayed, I sang, and I marveled at just how beautiful God has created this planet we call Earth. Cows were grazing on the gently sloping hills, some pairing with newborn calves. Horses basked in the afternoon sun, drinking in its warmth. And robins were everywhere. I felt so alive and so privileged to be able to enjoy such wonders. They are so simple, but I never want to take them for granted. I know that time marches on and some day I may not have this privilege, so I treasure each day as the minutes tick by. I thought as I prayed, how magnificent God has created this world in which we live and how luring it is, drawing us into its pleasures. I want to experience all of it, appreciate every bit of it, and glorify God in all of it.I thought about how privileged these people are who live out here and how ashamed I was of myself for wishing that I could live in one of these fine houses. As I erased the lustful thoughts, I began to realize that I don't have to own a piece of this country life to enjoy its bounty. God has provided for me many opportunities to partake in experiencing rural living just by living in Humboldt County. For example, our friends ranch in Salmon Creek, http://theranchonsalmoncreek.blogspot.com
is a wonderful place where we spend time with our friends. And on any given day I can pick and choose a rural country road and admire it in all its beauty. I'm grateful for any and all opportunities God gives to enjoy His creation.
Monday, February 04, 2008
Adventures
Saturday, February 02, 2008
Grow Like the Redwoods


How does it happen? You blink and they grow up. One day they seek you out for food and comfort and before you realize it, all they want are the keys to the car. Well, not really, but my goodness, how quickly it does seem to happen. Tonight she went to the semi-formal. She went with a group, so at least it wasn't a boyfriend thing.
....She looked so beautiful. She spent a good part of the afternoon getting herself ready. Her sister came over to help her do her hair and makeup. Carefully making sure everything looked good together, not too much mascara, just the right amount of eye shadow, a little blush.
.....My, she looked beautiful. She always has been a beauty. Even as a baby she glowed with a warm smile that she eagerly shared with anyone who looked her way. She still smiles continually. Her ability to look at the world in all its splendor, seeing only the things that are good; it's contagious. I almost used "Joy" as her middle name.
I know she will have a great time with her friends, laughing, dancing, just hanging out.
I wish it all didn't pass so quickly. I wish we could freeze frame certain parts of our lives. The parts that we like. I am so glad to have been a part of her life. Glad that I have helped shape and mold her into the woman she will become. A young man's wife. A child's mother. It is not only an incredible experience to parent her, but it is truly a joyful one. Before long I will be crying at her wedding, so I probably shouldn't get so melancholy about all this! Just more ponderings...
Monday, January 28, 2008
Sunday, January 27, 2008
Snow in the Pacific Northwest


Today we had a snow storm. Big deal, right? Most areas of the country have snow this time of year. We don't usually get snow where we live, though. The outlying foothills will definitely have dustings from time to time, but we live down at sea level, so when it snows here, it is a very big deal. So being Californians not used to seeing the snow fall, we all jumped in the car to go search for photos and maybe some sledding. Our quiet, restful Sunday afternoon quickly became an eventful snowball fighting afternoon. We really had a fun time. I know, you're thinking cheap thrills. Well, yes, cheap thrills they may be, but we enjoyed every minute of it. I love unexpected surprises like this. The mundane quickly becomes the exceptional in a matter of moments. After frolicking for an hour or so, we hurried back home to return to our vigil around the woodstove! Good times.

Thursday, January 17, 2008
Humboldt "rasta" knitting

Here is the photo of my first major knitting project. The pattern is for beginners and it's called a prayer shawl. I feel such a sense of accomplishment! My DIL helped me get started on it and from there I went for it by myself. I have knitted hats and scarves before, but this was a bigger project. Of course there are mistakes in it. It won't be winning any ribbons at the Humboldt County fair or anything like that! For me, though, it is just what I wanted. Gus gave me a ball winder and a swift for Christmas, so now I am all set to do many more projects. My next endeavor is to make socks for s-2's birthday. Below is a photo of what not to look for when searching for a nice fleece. These are wild sheep on the Ranch on Salmon Creek. This is not where I got my fleece for my projects. These wooly mammoth sheep have been roaming around TJ & M's ranch for years without getting sheared!
Wednesday, January 16, 2008
The art of spinning
No, not like the Shakers used to do in church meetings, but with an Ashford spinning wheel. I have a passion to see the ordinary transformed into the extraordinary. Every year I purchase what's called a "fleece" (like the one Gideon used in the Bible to collect or not collect dew), from a shepherd in our area that specifically raises sheep in order to sell their curly locks. Throughout the year, Mr. Van der Naak carefully watches over his ewes, blanketing them to keep dirt off of their wool, preparing them for shearing in the early spring. At the Fiber Faire each fall I sift through the piles of fleeces to select just the one I want, then I bring it home to begin the transformation. While the blanket on the sheep keeps redwood fronds, hay and the occasional poo from anchoring deep within its rastafarian locks, it still smells....like a sheep. Baaaaaaa..... Nearly dripping with lanolinI have to wash it, then rinse it (several times ) in my bathtub with hot water and Dawn liquid detergent,(see photo). Yes, it smells. But we all know,
At this point, it smells, looks and feels a lot better than a few weeks ago. So now I can begin to card it.
I have what's called a drum carder (photo of my DIL) to expedite this process. The carder is very old, but it works quite well for what I need. The wool goes in curly and ragged and comes out soft and fluffy. The tedious work is done, now it's time for spinning. This of course is the end that justifies all the work mentioned above. Sitting in front of a warm fire on a cold winter day with the gentle swishing sound of the wheel spinning 'round and 'round is my idea of a good day.
(My cat, Rye-Rye, also likes it.)After enough fiber has been spun, it's time for plying and setting the twist of the yarn. At this point, the yarn can be made into what's called a skein, wound into a ball ready for knitting or crocheting into something lovely. My first project from my own handspun yarn is a shawl. I wanted one that was lacey and light, but warm. I didn't dye the wool, I left it it's natural color. (I will post a photo later). The weather is still cold outside, so I will have plenty of time to wear my beautiful artwork. I hope I don't sound like a braggart here, but I am just so amazed and excited that with some diligence and fortitude, one can actually make a wearable piece of clothing out of something that once graced the back of a barnyard lamb. (without hurting the animal). Once again I am awed and amazed that God has orchestrated such a beautiful symphony of events that allow us to fulfill our natural inclination to "be in His image" by being creative.
Friday, January 11, 2008
More than an afternoon's worth

The intense winter weather took a rest today. The sun actually came out this morning and it was warm. For about 30 minutes....then the clouds began to form again. So, being from Humboldt County, I rally the children and the dogs and holler, "Let's go out to the beach!" Since our nice days are drastically numbered this time of year, this is what we Humboldters must do. The errands get postponed, the chores are left undone and the school work gets left behind even if only for an hour or two. Faces that were moments ago sullen and downcast are now glowing with the anticipation of fun! It's amazing how quickly all of our attitudes improve just by getting out in the fresh air for a short time. Cabin fever can run into the critical stage this time of year.
Once here, screams of delight fill the air as the kids jump out of the truck with arms and legs flying. Hide and go seek in the tall dune grass is always a favorite, (No matter how old you are!).
The dogs hit the sand running before we can even get our coats on. The cabin fever affects them too, I guess. The sound of the ocean waves again, soothes my soul. I feel a rush of peace come over me as I allow the creation of God to wash away my anxieties and stresses. Mmmm. Nice.
I love the way Our Heavenly Father provides such sweet delights for us in the simplest ways. When the days are sometimes difficult to get through, He offers a subtle suggestion that will lift our hearts and our spirits. He is a wonderful God. Often times we may think that we are alone in our difficulties while everyone else around us is doing just fine. I am continually reminded that God our Father truly does give us the desires of our hearts if we would just turn our minds and ears toward Him so that we may receive it.
Wednesday, January 09, 2008
New Year, old me

Though the year is new, the self same me is still just that...the same. I really don't get the whole new year, new outlook concept anyway. After all, this month of Sundays is no different than the 31 days of last month. The diversity of this particular month of January is what intrigues me. I have discovered over the course of the last few days that January is a fantastic month. At a time when most of the country is swirling in a flurry of unpredictable, uncomfortable weather, parts of the Southwest are basking in generously warm, sunny days. I discovered this on a recent trip to San Diego.
I grew up in S. D. County, but have spent the last 25 yrs. in Northern California. My family and I caravaned our way down the interstate with our traveling trailer home and a couple of friends to find our spot in the sun. We landed at a campground right on the sandy beaches of Oceanside, north of the Oceanside Harbor. Now like I said, I grew up near here, made my childhood memories here, and still have many relatives here, but coming back during the off season days of January took me by surprise. Not only did I find sunshine, I also found weather warm enough to actually penetrate this thick winter- white Northern California skin. The days were wintry indeed, though not at all like the wintry days of the town I now call home. Mornings were welcomed with the brilliant sun rising over the eastern foothills. Yoga on the sand with gentle ocean breezes enhancing each pose, the sounds of shorebreaks performing their rhythmical dance along the water's edge, the sun pressing into my skin to remind me of its ability to regenerate my soul. I found myself in a state of carnal intoxication. Could this be possible? Did I not just days before endure inches of rain under perpetually cloudy skies, days that go by without knowing what time it is without looking at a clock because the sun never comes out? Unbelievable. Now I know why so many people live down here.
I am amazed at the diversity of the climate of this vast state of California. How upon traveling from one end to the other on any given day one can experience such dramatic changes in surroundings. And not only in surroundings, but actually experience dramatic changes in attitude as well. The long, gray days of winter are only as gray as we allow them to be. I marvel at the human ability to transform our minds to a place where we find peace and balance. Sometimes a little change in environment, only a short distance away can do exceedingly more for our outlook than we might otherwise think. January is still January, but depending on where your place in the sun is,(or Son) determines how easy or how difficult it is to endure. Knowing that February, March and April all press into May, then quickly into June, July and August keeps me anticipating a warmer day.
Sunday, November 18, 2007
Birthday bash

Indulge me just for the moment. Today is my birthday. Not just any birthday, but another dreaded birthday. A big one. The half century mark......yes, I just reached my 50th year. I can hardly believe it myself. It's not that I don't want to necessarily be 50, it's just that I don't know how to act 50. I have all of these preconceived ideas of what I should act like, dress like, or even talk like, but I just want to be me. The me that is comfortable being a little bit younger than 50. The me that a few short years ago remembers what it felt like to have my preborn child move within my womb or the me that still likes to slip into my bathing suit and catch some waves to bodysurf in the ocean. Sometimes I want to just hop on my touring bike and go for a long ride like I used to be able to do. For some reason, I have this little voice of maturity screaming inside my head that says I should be past these sorts of things. But then again, I don't want to give up these things just because I am 50. (Well, now, of course the pregnancy thing is definitely out of this new reality! It's the memories that seem so fresh). I guess it all comes a little easier as the years go by. For now, though, I will just turn the page of my journal and keep writing; recording the thoughts of my heart & seeking the Lord in all His goodness.
